make you feel my love.

tonight the twinsies were giving each other a harder time than usual.
they were sent to bed immediately after a horrible moment of 5 year old arguments
and they were pretty upset. my little mia cried and cried, i’ve never seen her cry so much.
it crumpled my heart into a tight ball.

i’m not one to wince when i discipline children, but she’s had such a rough day
and i didn’t want her crying herself to sleep. i couldn’t let it happen, so i didn’t.
i climbed into her plush princess bed and spooned her tiny body while telling her it was
okay and not to cry anymore. i explained why she was in trouble and she would
respond with head nods and finally turned over to face me. she gripped me so tightly
and placed her tiny forehead on my own, not letting go. it was the sweetest moment.

she’s not a child of mine and i can’t imagine the intensity of attachment my mother feels
towards us, seeing us go through all that we do and only being able to guide us from
a distance. then i began to imagine the way that God feels about us and the tears
started streaming even harder. as my palm rested on mia’s back, i prayed for her to
experience the best life possible. that she’d find strength in moments of pain & fear,
that she’d grow close to her Creator and learn all she could from Him to carry her on.

His attachment to us is strong. we came from Him and to Him we will return.
there are some things that i don’t understand, i’m not seeing a piece of the puzzle,
i’m still seeking and looking for answers. but i know because of the experience’s i’ve had with love
that He is like this. His heart breaks when we hit a rough patch, He wants us to find joy,
He wants to give us grace and peace, He wants us to know and live in the purest form of life.

Adele’s Make You Feel My Love is playing as I type this,
putting into a song what I felt in my heart tonight. Take a listen.

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One Comment to “make you feel my love.”

  1. Oh, Jen. This was just beautiful. What a way to start the morning, reading one of your posts and crying. Love and miss you so.

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